After almost a month and a half of consulting, waiting, evaluating, researching, more waiting, and deciding, my surgery is finally scheduled. Barix called me today after receiving the copy of my psychological evaluation. My surgery is scheduled for Thursday, April 30th (ironically, enough, that's my brother's 30th birthday).
I will go for my PATS (pre-admission testing) on Wednesday, April 15th. My surgeon, Dr. Boe, will put me on a 10-day liquid diet before surgery. The reason for this is to get your liver in shape for the laproscopic surgery. I know that's going to be difficult, especially considering that I will be trying to live my life (events, parties, etc.) for those two weeks. To limit myself to broth and all liquids will be difficult, but worth it!
I haven't really had enough time for this whole thing to sink in. It's going to be such a life-altering moment...I have to prepare myself mentally for it! I'm so glad that my husband and my family is on board. That will make the entire process so much easier for me. My husband has already taken off the day of my surgery and the day after. I'm so greatful that he's so understanding and willing to take this chance with me for a new, healthy life!
I suppose I have two more weeks before my life changes for good -- and I do emphasize, for "good." It will be a very positive thing for me and I really am looking forward to my new life! :)
Friday, March 27, 2009
Wednesday, March 25, 2009
Quick Update
I had my psychological evaluation on Friday, March 13th and finally (and, yes, I mean finally) got a copy of my evaluation today. The doctor faxed it to my surgeon's office, and once they review it, their scheduling department will call me to schedule the surgery. Woohoo!
It's been a long couple of emotional months trying to decide what to do. I'm glad that this part is finally behind me. Now I can look forward and focus on the actual surgery, recovery, and lifelong changes that will be made afterwards.
I definitely feel like I've done my due diligence. I've talked extensively with three people that have had the gastric bypass surgery. I've learned all about the good, the bad, and the ugly. I feel like I don't have any false assumptions about what to expect. I know it will be a long, slow recovery and that my life will change forever. But, that's what I look forward to the most. The change.
I'll update you all again once the surgery has been scheduled. In the meantime, I'll continue to maintain a patient (yet bursting inside with excitement) mentality. :)
It's been a long couple of emotional months trying to decide what to do. I'm glad that this part is finally behind me. Now I can look forward and focus on the actual surgery, recovery, and lifelong changes that will be made afterwards.
I definitely feel like I've done my due diligence. I've talked extensively with three people that have had the gastric bypass surgery. I've learned all about the good, the bad, and the ugly. I feel like I don't have any false assumptions about what to expect. I know it will be a long, slow recovery and that my life will change forever. But, that's what I look forward to the most. The change.
I'll update you all again once the surgery has been scheduled. In the meantime, I'll continue to maintain a patient (yet bursting inside with excitement) mentality. :)
Tuesday, March 10, 2009
Getting a Little Nervous
The next step in this process is a psychological evaluation. It's required by the doctor and also by your insurance company. They want to make sure:
1. That you know what you are getting into
2. That you are prepared for the psychological changes that will happen once you have the surgery
3. That you're not some psychotic freak that will flip on them after surgery
Anyway, my psych evaulation is scheduled for this Friday (Friday the 13th coincidentally). I'm a little nervous about what the psychologist is going to ask me. Yes, I'm ready for this surgery. I've never been more ready for anything in my life. Yes, I know about the possible complications and risks associated with the surgery. Yes, I know what to expect afterwards (liquid diet for 2 weeks, etc.). Believe me, I've done my research. I've talked with several people who have had the surgery done. I don't feel that I'm blind about anything going in.
I'm just afraid that the psychologist will try to talk me out of it. No matter what she says, I am ready to go in FULL FORCE!!! The thought of having a completely new, self-confident, comfortable, active life definitely outweighs any possible complications or side effects.
I'll let you know how the psych evaluation goes on Friday!!! :)
Until then, I'll keep dreaming about the skinny me!!!
1. That you know what you are getting into
2. That you are prepared for the psychological changes that will happen once you have the surgery
3. That you're not some psychotic freak that will flip on them after surgery
Anyway, my psych evaulation is scheduled for this Friday (Friday the 13th coincidentally). I'm a little nervous about what the psychologist is going to ask me. Yes, I'm ready for this surgery. I've never been more ready for anything in my life. Yes, I know about the possible complications and risks associated with the surgery. Yes, I know what to expect afterwards (liquid diet for 2 weeks, etc.). Believe me, I've done my research. I've talked with several people who have had the surgery done. I don't feel that I'm blind about anything going in.
I'm just afraid that the psychologist will try to talk me out of it. No matter what she says, I am ready to go in FULL FORCE!!! The thought of having a completely new, self-confident, comfortable, active life definitely outweighs any possible complications or side effects.
I'll let you know how the psych evaluation goes on Friday!!! :)
Until then, I'll keep dreaming about the skinny me!!!
Sunday, March 8, 2009
Looking Forward to All the Changes...All of Them!!!
I've been surfing the message boards at Barix Clinics (the place that I'm having my surgery done) and I have to say that I'm completely inspired and motivated...yet on the flipside, scared shitless. :(
Seeing and reading about the results that patients have had with gastric bypass surgery is so inspiring. I can only hope to have the same life-changing results that these people have had. That is inspiring and motivating.
On the other hand, reading about the changes in eating habits is a little scary. I know it has to be done -- eating small portions and sticking to certain restrictions (no sugar, etc.). But, it's going to be hard. I'm hopeful that I will be able to adjust and also help influence the eating habits of my family. I hope to be a better "chef" when preparing meals at home -- that will benefit both me and my family.
I know it's going to be hard, but it WILL BE WORTH IT in the end! When I think about what my life will be like after the surgery, I think I'll be able to do it!!! I know I can!!!
The message boards are very information and inspirational, so if you're interested in hearing from others who have had the surgery, go here:
http://www.barixclinicsstore.com/message_boards.html
Until next time, peace out! :)
Seeing and reading about the results that patients have had with gastric bypass surgery is so inspiring. I can only hope to have the same life-changing results that these people have had. That is inspiring and motivating.
On the other hand, reading about the changes in eating habits is a little scary. I know it has to be done -- eating small portions and sticking to certain restrictions (no sugar, etc.). But, it's going to be hard. I'm hopeful that I will be able to adjust and also help influence the eating habits of my family. I hope to be a better "chef" when preparing meals at home -- that will benefit both me and my family.
I know it's going to be hard, but it WILL BE WORTH IT in the end! When I think about what my life will be like after the surgery, I think I'll be able to do it!!! I know I can!!!
The message boards are very information and inspirational, so if you're interested in hearing from others who have had the surgery, go here:
http://www.barixclinicsstore.com/message_boards.html
Until next time, peace out! :)
Saturday, March 7, 2009
Glad to Have Support Along the Way!
Well, I finally told a few other people about my pending gastric bypass surgery. Previously, only a few co-workers (who had already had the surgery done), my husband, my best friend, and my mother knew. Now my sister-in-law knows. I'm glad I told her, because I really value her opinion.
I have my psych evaluation next Friday afternoon. Once that is completed, I'm able to schedule my surgery. Wow, what a smooth and quick process this has been. I know this is the easy part of it, and more difficult times are ahead of me. In the long run, though, I know that it will be worth it.
Here's a list of everything that I'm looking forward to after the surgery and after the weight comes off:
1. Getting dressed and not having to "jam" myself into my clothes
2. Walking out of my house every morning feeling confident, and not trying to hide behind things
3. Actually wanting to be photographed with my family, instead of always offering to be the one to take the photo
4. Being able to tuck a shirt into my pants and wear a belt
5. Not having to shop in Avenue and Lane Bryant (and pay ridiculous money for plus size clothing that looks like curtain fabric or a tent)
6. Being able to wear a swimsuit on the beach and not feel like a beached whale
7. Being able to climb a set of stairs without being out of breath at the top
8. Waking up in the morning and not having chronic back and knee pain
9. Jumping at the opportunity to take my kids for a walk around the neighborhood
10. Just being me - the real me - instead of this fat person that I've become
I know a lot of those seem vain, but it's been a nightmare living like this for the past 20 years. Each year, my weight has steadily climbed up to the point that I knew something had to be done. All the diets I've tried over the years failed (partly because of my lack of motivation). But, I also think partly due to the fact that I've stretched my stomach out so much with overeating that it's hard to limit what you eat. This way, with this surgery, I'll be forced to limit what I eat -- or else I'll actually get sick.
I know it's not going to be an easy journey, but it's one that I'm willing to take. It's something that I will have to work very hard at, not something that is a miracle weight loss cure. I know this is a commitment that I'm undertaking for the rest of my life. I'm hoping to also influence the way my family eats too. Since I'll have to eat healthier, they'll have to eat healthier. What better gift to give my kids? Instead of them acquiring my poor junkfood eating habits, they will hopefully be equipped with healthy eating and lifestyle changes like me!!!
At this point, I'm hoping for surgery in April or May. Still haven't figured out how I'm going to do it with work, but I'll manage. I'll hopefully be able to work from home a bit, so that will make the adjustment a little easier. I'll keep you informed as things progress, but I'm ready for a change. Spring is right around the corner, and hopefully, so is a new body, life, and outlook for me!!!
I have my psych evaluation next Friday afternoon. Once that is completed, I'm able to schedule my surgery. Wow, what a smooth and quick process this has been. I know this is the easy part of it, and more difficult times are ahead of me. In the long run, though, I know that it will be worth it.
Here's a list of everything that I'm looking forward to after the surgery and after the weight comes off:
1. Getting dressed and not having to "jam" myself into my clothes
2. Walking out of my house every morning feeling confident, and not trying to hide behind things
3. Actually wanting to be photographed with my family, instead of always offering to be the one to take the photo
4. Being able to tuck a shirt into my pants and wear a belt
5. Not having to shop in Avenue and Lane Bryant (and pay ridiculous money for plus size clothing that looks like curtain fabric or a tent)
6. Being able to wear a swimsuit on the beach and not feel like a beached whale
7. Being able to climb a set of stairs without being out of breath at the top
8. Waking up in the morning and not having chronic back and knee pain
9. Jumping at the opportunity to take my kids for a walk around the neighborhood
10. Just being me - the real me - instead of this fat person that I've become
I know a lot of those seem vain, but it's been a nightmare living like this for the past 20 years. Each year, my weight has steadily climbed up to the point that I knew something had to be done. All the diets I've tried over the years failed (partly because of my lack of motivation). But, I also think partly due to the fact that I've stretched my stomach out so much with overeating that it's hard to limit what you eat. This way, with this surgery, I'll be forced to limit what I eat -- or else I'll actually get sick.
I know it's not going to be an easy journey, but it's one that I'm willing to take. It's something that I will have to work very hard at, not something that is a miracle weight loss cure. I know this is a commitment that I'm undertaking for the rest of my life. I'm hoping to also influence the way my family eats too. Since I'll have to eat healthier, they'll have to eat healthier. What better gift to give my kids? Instead of them acquiring my poor junkfood eating habits, they will hopefully be equipped with healthy eating and lifestyle changes like me!!!
At this point, I'm hoping for surgery in April or May. Still haven't figured out how I'm going to do it with work, but I'll manage. I'll hopefully be able to work from home a bit, so that will make the adjustment a little easier. I'll keep you informed as things progress, but I'm ready for a change. Spring is right around the corner, and hopefully, so is a new body, life, and outlook for me!!!
Sunday, March 1, 2009
The Excitement is Building...A Little Too Quickly!
The excitement is building. It hasn't even been a week since I made the phone call to start the insurance process for my gastric bypass surgery. I'm in that waiting period where my insurance reviews the claim to make sure that they will cover it. I know it's a long process (hell, it took me a lot of years to get to the size I'm at, so I should be able to wait a few weeks). The doctor's office told me that I should hear back about the insurance approval within about two weeks.
I can't even begin to express the feelings and emotions that are running through me right now. Excitement. Nervousness. Anxiousness. Anxiety. Happiness. Feeling petrified. Feeling depressed. Feeling everything. I wish I could just close my eyes, and wake up in the recovery room. Or better yet, wake up three months after the surgery has been done.
I know the old saying "Good things come to those who wait", but this is awful. After making such a life-altering decision, you almost want instant gratification. I keep telling myself to calm down and be patient, but when there is such an incredible outcome expected at the end of this journey, one can't help but to be a bit impatient.
On another note, I finally told my mother yesterday that I'm hoping to have the gastric bypass surgery done. Honestly, that was the part of this whole process that I feared the most. I could handle the surgery, massive adjustment in eating habits after the surgery, some of the complications I'm expecting from surgery. But, I couldn't handle or didn't know how to tell my mother. My biggest critic in life. I knew once my husband was on board that the next hurdle would be telling my mother.
She handled it unexpectedly good. I was surprised. I heard gripes of "You're crazy!" or "Don't take the easy way out!" in my head before telling her. But, she handled it with an unexpected calmness and expressed the expected parental concerns. I need to sit down and talk with her one-on-one some more about things, but I thing (and hope) that she is on board with my decision. I can't tell you what a relief it is that she didn't rip my head off when I told her.
The next part of the process for me is to get a psych evaluation. This is required by the doctor and probably also of my insurance. I spent an hour on the phone on Friday trying to find a psychologist who would be willing to do a psych evaluation of a pre-surgical gastric bypass patient. The majority of them said that they won't do it unless I join their practice and come to weekly therapy sessions. They won't do the once-and-done type of evaluation.
I did find one psychologist, I think, that will do the evaluation. I have to call back on Monday morning to make the appointment, but I am hopeful! Once that is done, I just wait to hear back from my insurance company on approval. Fingers crossed, after approval I would just schedule the surgery based on my surgeon's availability.
As much as I'd like to wait until July to have the surgery done, I think I might consider April/May if they have any openings. I will probably be home from work for about a week, and I have the sick time to use for that.
Another factor I am dreading in the back of my mind is the expense with buying a new wardrobe of clothing. As the weight starts dropping, I will go through about 10 different sizes before I get to my hopeful final weight. I'm sure I'll rely on some safety pins and old clothing as the journey progresses. No use buying new clothing each step of the way!
Anyway, as you can, I'm both excited and nervous about the whole process. I think the tough part is over -- making the decision. Now, I just sit...wait...and wait some more!
I can't even begin to express the feelings and emotions that are running through me right now. Excitement. Nervousness. Anxiousness. Anxiety. Happiness. Feeling petrified. Feeling depressed. Feeling everything. I wish I could just close my eyes, and wake up in the recovery room. Or better yet, wake up three months after the surgery has been done.
I know the old saying "Good things come to those who wait", but this is awful. After making such a life-altering decision, you almost want instant gratification. I keep telling myself to calm down and be patient, but when there is such an incredible outcome expected at the end of this journey, one can't help but to be a bit impatient.
On another note, I finally told my mother yesterday that I'm hoping to have the gastric bypass surgery done. Honestly, that was the part of this whole process that I feared the most. I could handle the surgery, massive adjustment in eating habits after the surgery, some of the complications I'm expecting from surgery. But, I couldn't handle or didn't know how to tell my mother. My biggest critic in life. I knew once my husband was on board that the next hurdle would be telling my mother.
She handled it unexpectedly good. I was surprised. I heard gripes of "You're crazy!" or "Don't take the easy way out!" in my head before telling her. But, she handled it with an unexpected calmness and expressed the expected parental concerns. I need to sit down and talk with her one-on-one some more about things, but I thing (and hope) that she is on board with my decision. I can't tell you what a relief it is that she didn't rip my head off when I told her.
The next part of the process for me is to get a psych evaluation. This is required by the doctor and probably also of my insurance. I spent an hour on the phone on Friday trying to find a psychologist who would be willing to do a psych evaluation of a pre-surgical gastric bypass patient. The majority of them said that they won't do it unless I join their practice and come to weekly therapy sessions. They won't do the once-and-done type of evaluation.
I did find one psychologist, I think, that will do the evaluation. I have to call back on Monday morning to make the appointment, but I am hopeful! Once that is done, I just wait to hear back from my insurance company on approval. Fingers crossed, after approval I would just schedule the surgery based on my surgeon's availability.
As much as I'd like to wait until July to have the surgery done, I think I might consider April/May if they have any openings. I will probably be home from work for about a week, and I have the sick time to use for that.
Another factor I am dreading in the back of my mind is the expense with buying a new wardrobe of clothing. As the weight starts dropping, I will go through about 10 different sizes before I get to my hopeful final weight. I'm sure I'll rely on some safety pins and old clothing as the journey progresses. No use buying new clothing each step of the way!
Anyway, as you can, I'm both excited and nervous about the whole process. I think the tough part is over -- making the decision. Now, I just sit...wait...and wait some more!
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